


Do you see the sun?

by Skydancer8



Series: NCT One-shots [11]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan-centric, Love, Neglection, Realization, Sad, hyung, nct 127, taeyong haechan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-03-29
Packaged: 2019-12-26 05:58:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18277193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skydancer8/pseuds/Skydancer8
Summary: To the world, he was Haechan, the embodiment of the sun and the mood maker.In reality, he was Lee Donghyuck, the insecure boy who couldn't deal with his own problems.All he wanted was his hyungs to realize that Haechan existed only as a mask to his real personality.But of course, Taeyong would realize.He's the leader after all.





	Do you see the sun?

 

_Who is Donghyuck, who is Haechan?_

Donghyuck was a teen, thrown into the world of entertainment at an early age. He had left the beautiful sea of Jeju Island in order to become who he was now, to sing passionately on stage. To the world, he was introduced as the sunny boy named Haechan, the youngest in NCT 127 and also a part of NCT Dream.

Haechan was a strong person, who would sulk playfully at the rejection of affection and laugh at those older than him with no care of the consequences. It was a persona that mimicked his real personality when he had entered the company years ago, the funny kid who grew up in a household of parents who showed love openly. Haechan blew up when he was among the members and said the most ridiculous things because that was the personality the company had set on him.

The annoying brat, to say it clearly.

Yet, as it seemed, the hyungs seemed to adore this brat, at first. He was the one to make them laugh at the beginning of their debut, the one who would lift their moods during the tense moments in the waiting room. They loved the smiles and the way he clung to them.

It made variety more easier.

It was a running joke for them reject his shows of affection and cut him down when he was speaking. Perhaps, to the viewers, it was kind of like a karma kind of situation that they'd all laugh about in the comment section and repeat when a new video came out. At first, he didn't mind because it was for the camera, right? They did it to add more of those funny tweets that would add more fans to their ever growing fanbase, right?

"Go away, Haechan, don't exert so much energy and complain about being tired later on" Yuta said as he shrugged the boy off his shoulder. "You always do that"

"Try getting through the day without being so annoying" Jaehyun later added when he had tried to uplift the mood during practice.

That wasn't what he wanted. He had acted so energetic in hopes that his hyungs would feel that way too. He hadn't meant to annoy them, or perhaps they thought he was Haechan, who did all those things for the sole purpose of annoying them. Did they not realize that they were looking at Lee Donghyuck?

In the middle of the choreo, someone's foot swiped under his own, causing him to fall on his back, grunting in pain.

"You were too far left" Taeyong pointed out, all of them watching as Donghyuck picked himself up slowly. "This is the 7th time, Channie"

"If this continues, we won't get past the second chorus" Doyoung grumbled, wiping his sweat. "Stop playing around, Haechan"

"As if he'd listen" came the small voice of Sicheng, and Donghyuck winced. "Haechan will be Haechan"

He tried not to look hurt, and ended up laughing out loud, adding a small remark of "I know you were worried about me", hyung"

"Hardly" came the cold reply and Donghyuck had to admit that that kind of hurt. Actually, it hurt a lot.

It hurt worse than the cramps in his leg from balancing Dream and 127's comebacks with a hectic schedule. It hurt worse than the migraines that attacked him at night, a proof of his overworked body and lack of proper nutrition. He was still underweight (wasn't everyone?) and was growing thinner as the comeback date came nearer. But Haechan could deal with that, right? Haechan wouldn't complain, and that was the boy the hyungs liked. The one who worked hard, and barely fretted about overworking.

But Lee Donghyuck just wanted a pair of arms around him, hugging him tight and telling him that he did a good job, that he could make it through. As much as Lee Donghyuck wanted that, he knew that he shouldn't be a burden and let Haechan take over, at least until Lee Donghyuck could manage himself.

"Okay-" Taeyong called, glancing at Donghyuck from the mirror, worry settling in his chest. "-let's do it again"

 

* * *

 

_"Why do you call me Haechan?"_

 

Taeyong always tried to be the leader everyone wanted. Yet, with 21 members, it was hard for him to tend to all of them, especially when their schedules were split apart. Every now and then, he would miss of them and would be hit with guilt until he made it up in the dorms. It never slipped his knowledge when they took unhealthy diets or overexerted themselves with extra practice. He always knew how everyone was doing.

He should have known that he could never keep watch of 21 boys all by himself. Of all people he could have neglected, he had forgotten Haechan.

It was in the waiting room during an SM concert when he realized. He was sitting on a couch by himself, swiping through pictures in his gallery. There was a collection of pictures he had labeled under '127 babies' and he'd stopped at a picture when they were all at the beach and Haechan had thrown himself on Johnny's back, laughing out loud.

That was months ago, and Taeyong found himself srcolling up to the earlier pictures where Haechan was smiling in the photos as usual, but seemed to be a foot away from the other members. His smile had changed, too, less free, his lips sealed shut.

Then he had a realization, those small moments he had once dismissed coming back and fitting into the puzzle.

Haechan disappearing into his room when all of them laughed together during a night of beer.

Haechan frowning when once again, they rejected his hugs.

Haechan walking out of the waiting room when Taeyong started playing around with the others.

Haechan staying in his room during the day offs, not coming out of his bed until persuaded to.

 

_"Hyung, do you still remember my name?"_

_"I don't have amnesia, Haechan"_

_"N-no, hyung, my real name"_

_"...Lee Donghyuck, isn't it?"_

_"...Why don't you call me that anymore, hyung?"_

 

Oh God, he had forgotten Lee Donghyuck.

Of all people, he had neglected the boy who needed comfort the most, who had grown up surrounded by the seas and friendly neighbors and was going through the phrase where he'd start feeling-

"My God, how on Earth did I forget?"

* * *

 

Taeyong found him in his room., Jaehyun out of the dorms for a magazine shooting.

He was cocooned in his blankets, small whimpers coming from the bundle. It was obvious that he was crying, perhaps a ritual he did almost every night. Taeyong stood at the doorway for  amoment, thinking of what to do. In the end, he decided to give what Donghyuck wanted the most.

He slipped into the bed, making it dip slightly, and wrapped his arms around the Donghyuck cocoon from behind.

"H-hyung?" came the soft whisper in the darkness.

Taeyong was quiet for a moment, throwing away his plan on comforting him and deciding to go with his gut feeling.

"I'm sorry, Hyuckie"

The bundle tensed up before relaxing. In his grip, Donghyuck turned around so that they were face to face on the bed. "You haven't called me that in a long time"

"Too long, I suppose" Taeyong replied, gently brushing his fingers through the youngers chestnut hair. "I won't let you go again"

It was Donghyucks' turn to become silent. He wriggled for a moment, freeing his arms before he wrapped them around Taeyongs' waist and pulled him close, sighing in contemptment. It made Taeyong wonder how long he had waited, how long he stood patient to feel the kind of comfort he felt now.

"I'm so sorry, hyung is really sorry" Taeyong whispered over and over. "I didn't want you to feel like an outsider. You're not Haechan, I know now. You were never Haechan"

For once, the Haechan that Donghyuck had fixed as a mask for so long pulled back to let Donghyuck through. Donghyuck who was scared of the future, who did not try to act like he was unafraid. 

Lee Donghyuck cried in Taeyongs' arms.

"I thought you were the strongest" Taeyong whispered lovingly. "But you are still young Donghyuck, I'll never forget that. You can cry whenever you want, because you have the right to. I love you Lee Donghyuck, we all do"

 

 

At last, Lee Donghyuck felt at home.

**Author's Note:**

> Thaks for reading! Be sure to leave comments and kudo's!!!


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